Monday, May 21, 2012

Forgotten Prayers

I love my job with all of my heart. Somebody asked me a few months ago, "If you didn't have to worry about money, how would you spend your time?" I really thought about that question, and as I did so came to an incredible realization. I would be doing exactly what I am doing!

I work in an environment that allows me to be myself. I am allowed to testify of my Savior, to laugh and tease, to be cared for and to care for others, to share sorrows and joys, to lift and strengthen, to be known, to be in the mountains, to increase my understanding of my divine nature, to work at something worth working at. I know I am so blessed to have landed where I've landed, and acknowledge God's hands in the landing.

I was perusing old journal entries tonight and came across an entry on 8 March 2011 that brought tears to my eyes. I was nearing the end of my graduate coursework and beginning to worry about my next steps.

"I feel caged most days in graduate school--caged by expectations, protocol, precedents, and egos. I want to be free again--to create and to write the way I think best. As I'm finishing my last class and really getting involved with my thesis, I am beginning to feel wind under my wings again. I am anxious to fly, still chained to the ground (though not for long). Yet there's this weight on my shoulders--I fear even when my chains are gone I won't be able to fly. Once again I'll be launched into the workplace--struggling to maintain my sanity and bolster my divine identity amidst daily encounters with people and situations teaching me to be coarse and vulgar like the rest of the world. I am a daughter of God! Life is short, and I cannot afford to spend my days pretending I'm not...I want to spend my time glorifying God through the use of the many talents He has given me."

God answers prayers!!

I'd forgotten I was even worried about this, but here it is staring me in the face: proof God answers my prayers, even the forgotten ones.

In Church a few Sundays back we learned about the power of prayer, and the lesson was just for me. The inspired teacher suggested keeping track of the things we pray for and answers received. Not a new idea, but novel to me. I am now writing down my prayers, enabling me to remember and recognize God's hands in my life. My hope is that it will help to open my eyes, strengthen my testimony, and increase my gratitude for a God who has never forsaken me although I sometimes forget Him.

Oh how I thank God for answering my forgotten prayers!